Showing posts with label Daniel Pinkwater. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Daniel Pinkwater. Show all posts

Saturday, July 4, 2015

When strange things start to emerge, part 2


Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, the great composer and detective, is waiting for his mid-morning repast of cherry muffins when he is visited by the great French detective inspector Charles LeChat. All the muffins have disappeared from Paris, and Inspector LeChat fears that the same fate is befalling Vienna. The culprit may be the nobleman, Don Pastrami, who has been known to sing as the great operatic tenor Apollo Grosso-Fortissimo. After exciting adventures and terrible musical puns, Mozart lures him out of hiding by playing the tiny violin that he played when he was five. Then the great and terrifying confrontation scene commences:

Mozart:  "Don Pastrami! I've come to get you!"

Don Pastrami:  "You'll never get me!"

M: "You are the awwwwwful mufffffin fieeeeend!"

DP: "I am!"

M: "Why did you take the muffins?"

DP:  "I did it. I felt like it. That's all."

M:  "You must have had a reason."

DP:  "I didn't have a reason. Go away."

M: "Tell me. Tell me why you took the muffins."

DP:  "No!"

M:  "Tell me!"

DP:  "No! "

M:  "Tell!"

DP:  "No!"

M:  ''Tell!  Tell!"

DP:  "No! No!"

M:  "At least shake hands.......to show.........that you're not chiiiiiicken."

Truly one of the great scenes in opera, children's literature, or anywhere else.
--from The Muffin Fiend, Daniel Pinkwater. Lothrup, Lee & Shepherd, 1986

Saturday, November 5, 2011

When strange things start to emerge: Weird quote of the week


From Daniel Pinkwater's "Alan Mendelsohn, the Boy from Mars" (Dutton, 1982):

Our heroes have mastered Mind Control, and are messing with the principal of their high school, Bat Masterson High, by compelling him to sing the following morning announcements over the PA system:

GOOD MORN--WHEN THE SURF'S UP IN OLD CALIFORNIA, THERE'S JUST OLD PAINT AND ME.  JUST A BOY AND HIS HORSE ON A SURFBOARD, WHERE THE WIND AND THE WAVES ARE FREE.  SURFIN', SURFIN', SURFIN' WITH MY HORSE, SURFIN', SURFIN' WITH MY HORSE, DOO WAH, DOO WAH.

I WILL NOW GIVE THE CORRECT TIME.  CUCKOO--CUCKOO--CUCKOO--CUCKOO--CUCKOO--CUCKOO--CUCKOO--CUCKOO--CUCKOO.